Del, feeling of lassitude, weakness and despair, intense
(Bor)
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- "Lassitude" is weariness of body and mind from strain, cares or worries.
- "Weakness" is lack of energy required to perform efficiently.
- "Despair" is loss of hope in general as if nothing will happen as expected.
- "Intense" is extreme in degree.
- Ruta has completely lost the necessary strength and energy and is hopeless to be useful any more.
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Del, arrested
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- She has developed dislike for everything and is discouraged.
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Cowardice
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Being coward is unable to assert herself.
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Heedless
Slowness
Forgetful
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- Has become careless to do things properly.
- Her normal speed in movements is no more to be seen now. And for short intervals she experiences lack of control over her memory.
- She can neither stand and walk nor lie down but is hanging in between and passing time (in a sitting position).
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Sit, inclination to
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- "Waking on" means, when one’s sleep breaks. Here it has been interpreted that person concerned has been woken up by the condition of her health.
- Today the person feels broken. Exactly as one is woken up to one’s miserable condition, which makes him weep. How has it happened?
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Delirium, abortion, after (1)
Confusion, abortion, after (1)
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- Abortion/ Miscarriage means loss of the products of conception from the uterus before the fetus is viable.
- This can be interpreted to mean denial of motherhood or motherhood snatched.
- It has been observed that after losing the chance to become a mother, her mind had been affected in two ways i.e. delirium and confusion.
- In delirium, the mind is much perturbed and is not able to express itself properly. Talks as if mad.
- In confusion one is unable to clearly understand as to what exactly is the problem with the person. It is a sort of mixed up feeling, mind is not able to distinguish as to what to tell and how to tell or to pin-point one ’s ailments.
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- Here it will be important to know the general attitude of this person. She derives a sort of satisfaction from being called, looked at, and to serve as a mother, and it applies to everyone, old or young, father or husband around her. All are her children and she has a responsibility towards them. Here the Defiance is coming not in the sense of snapping the relations but just as a complaint against unreasonableness. That is why the remark follows, “You will realize my value only when I die.”
- Now about the motherhood. We have already defined the term mother which means the one who originates, brings up and affords protection. Here the defiance is with regard to any threat to her children from any quarter and in any shape. She is so sensitive that she cannot tolerate even the slightest criticism, or slightest ailment, attacking them. The sense of protection in her rises to the extent that she withdraws all her attention from everything else and devotes it towards the protection of her children. In this effort she exhausts herself even to the last drop of her energy. This effort is so desperate that she loses her balance of mind and acts as if totally confused.
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- She felt they had evil designs and were out to harm her children.
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Del, people behind him, someone is
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The overall feeling was that her loss of motherhood was because of the mischief of the same person
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She became full of depressing thoughts as the situation was not clear and did not know as to what was going to happen next
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- Sudden means without prior notice.
- These thoughts over took her unexpedtedly. Something that comes all of a sudden is always more shocking.
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Anxiety, chest, from stitching in (1)
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- Stitching means Sharp, Sudden and Intense pain
- Chest represents heart known to be the source of emotions which oppress one's mind and conscience.
- This rubric means that desire to express to someone one’s grief which is depressing one’s mind.
- Chest has another meaning "A box usually a large, strong one with a lid, for storage and safe keeping of valuables."
- In this sense, the feeling of stitch (intense pain) pertains to that part of the body which contains valuable organs, vital for existence.
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Anxiety, stitching, in spine, from (1)
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- Spine means that part of the body which acts as a support to keep the body in the right position and properly suspended.
- Experiencing stitches in both parts chest and spine means something very serious causing concern about what is in store (going to happen)
- She seems to be recognizing the fault and is anxious to consult someone about it.
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Starting, sleep from, touch, from slightest (1)
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- "Starting" means, coming into action all at once or experiencing jerks with no prior information.
- "Sleep" means a state of rest in which one is unaware of one’s surroundings.
- "Slightest" means lowest in intensity, and degree.
- "Touch" means, coming into contact of one’s body with that of another’s.
Interpretations
- Mind coming into contact with any thought which leaves its impact on it.
- She gets jerks because of sleep. If she does not sleep there are no jerks (shocks). Like-wise if she sleeps and gets slightest touch, she is started (reminded).
- She realizes that she did not take enough her health. This could be a shocking reminder for her, since she herself has been responsible for delay in starting her treatment and is getting touchy about this neglect.
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- Means to be worried about one’s moral duty which one has been neglecting in the passed and is doing so even now because of her miscalculations and the job requirement.
- She feels that the time has come to set the things right and save them from further loss.
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- She shrieks about her own health, because of the danger signal which the stitches in Chest /Spine
- She thinks she requires to remain fit to prevent the constant threat to her motherhood, like the one she had already experienced.
- The idea being that the same person who is after her may play mischief again. But she is not totally free from the thoughts about her self.
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- She is so touchy about it that even the slightest idea about the loss of self makes her feel nervous and desperate. This compels her to shriek and leads her to a state of delirium and confusion
- Addressing the persons to whom she gives service as mother (Not necessarily her own children,) she says, "You people are so demanding and selfish that you never care to consider my limitations and therefore I feel you will kill me one day".
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- When should one fear water? When its depth is not known and if one falls into it whether he is going to drown or not ?
- She fears that the stress caused on her nerves by the jerks (Starting i.e. sudden shocks) and the exertion as a result of crying at the top of her voice (when she becomes touchy) and the excitement (Heat) which has unknown depth (water) seems to be ill-directed may end in her death.
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Contradict, disposition to
Contrary
Quarrelsome
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- Ruta is not found in repertory under "Defiant" but has been noticed in practice.
- And takes up an attitude of non submission and rises to resist the forces which are trying to overpower her
- Defiant: This revolt is a sign of her touchiness. She feels it is her extra care for others that has resulted in this sorry state of affairs (so far her health is concerned).
- Contradict is inclination to stand in opposition to everything indiscriminately.
- Contrary is acting in a way without knowing that she is opposing her own intentions and beliefs.
- Quarrelsome is one who engages himself in disputes.
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Rage
- Contradict, disposition to
- Contrary
- Quarrelsome
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- Rage means extreme anger or excitement.
- To overcome her nervousness she tries to become bold and quarrel with the concerned people as if rising in revolt against those who in her view are (innocently) proving to be fatal for her.
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- This she does by contradicting them in every way, to ward them off. She opposes even those of their actions which as a matter of affection were suggestive of her.
- When politely told: “You always wanted us to, wait outside the kitchen while you are cooking refusing to accept any type of help etc. You never allowed us to cook for ourselves.”
- Interrupting the dialogue abruptly she quips, “I never said anything to anyone.”
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- She is not aware of her actions and words whether they are conveying the same sense which she wants to.
- But she says that this is not her intention. Hence the action
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- She is a careful mother but instead of getting sympathy and redress al of her grievances, she gets accusations of being unreasonable and crazy.
- She is a careful mother but from her behavior, it looks as if she wants to keep command and domination over everything around, leaving nothing to others to administer.
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Light, desire for
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- A sense of remorse follows, "Perhaps I require medicine. I shall have to take care of myself."
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